Tuesday, March 24, 2009

you and i are like dominoes

it's hard to tell you this
but i need some space
i need to be on my own and
explore the world alone

yes, your company is great
but sometimes i get distracted
caught up in my own scene and am
unaware of how others may be feeling

i didn't mean to hurt you
no, i'd never try to hurt you

i keep my emotions bottled up and
i'm running away from any sort of attachment
for fear there may be a re-enactment
of the past that's so prevalent in my memory

you and i were like dominoes
always pushing the other down with us
as we fell and just laid there
waiting for someone to pick us back up

i'd like to take some initiative
start a clean slate and
dive forward into this mess
and untangle it for myself

and i think you should too
i think you should too

Saturday, March 21, 2009

A New Chapter

& that being said,
it is certainly also a time to reflect on
how i have grown significantly.

it amazes me how much different
my new year has been in 2009
from 2008

this year started off with a break up
with the love of my life of two years.
at first i was incredibly depressed,
felt shocked and betrayed.
once getting over those initial feelings
i could then see the positive side of breaking up.

as much as i tried to deny it,
tim wasn't my type or "the one".
yes, parts of the relationship were magical,
and i don't regret a single minute.

but i have realized how much of my fire was put out by being with tim
and i became excited to get it back.

going into the future blinded excites me.

it has been several months since the break up now,
and i feel i have been getting my fire back
little by little as i go along.
it seems to keep getting easier & better.

oh & by the way, did i say i am a freshman in college?
why yes, i attend humboldt state university
and it has been one of the most eye opening experiences of my life.
i am incredibly in love with the area & my school
and i feel i have truly been gaining more and more knowledge everyday.

after months of trying to decide on a major,
i finally decided on journalism, specializing in photojournalism.
i feel i have a nact for writing and photography
and i incredibly enjoy doing both!
i feel this major will also enable me to travel all around the world
like i have always wanted to,
and the photo aspect of it will just make my life one big
collection and documentary of all my travels/life/& experiences.

Tuesday, January 15, 2008

life has been good lately. seriously, i can't complain. things are good.
i have been trying to keep my days productive, along with regular excersize.

Tuesday, January 8, 2008

this new year/new blogger

along with this new year i have felt a wind of opportunity, inspiration and motivation for trying new things. starting a blogger, including. along with pursuing interests, like photography and sewing, and beginning things i have been wanting to learn for forever it seems, like learning to play guitar. also trying to gather myself to reconstruct my former bubble of confidence that was lost few months past due to.. well um, complications. and i am more than happy to say i am finally graduating high school tomorrow morning, fucking finally and that my hair almost entirely consists of dread locks.
2008 is should be a good year [;